Three, Two, One… possibly none!
Nothing waits, including nothingness...
From three to two and to now one
Possibly none?!
Nothing waits...
Moments slip into memories, tucked into the corner of our minds
Recollection is fond and painful at times
Reality strikes at odd times
Our happiness has always been streaked with slivers and platefuls of sorrow and sighs
Life has soldered us, all three of us at different times, in different ways, in different contexts
Unique and novel we as a family surely were
At all times and for all reasons...
The pillar of strength and fortitude was mom
The soft and emotional glue was you
Somewhere between, at times strong, at times crushed, holding on to strength and
learning I have been given
Finding meaning at times in life, at times in love and in death too.
Crying in public is not done
Grief and difficulties are best kept private said my mom
Independence and strength infused by her
Held me up in the worst of fate's foul play
Many a times in weakness, affection and emotion have I quietly acknowledged
That I have learnt from you too
Much more than I admit or have said
For emotion is interwoven with reason just as reason is interlinked with emotion
Motivation and inspiration in ample Mom infused in me
Admiration and affection you have showered on me
In the throes of hardship I have found courage
In times of turmoil I have found direction.
Mom prepared us both for her going away
Chalking out the next steps for you and for me, both
In times recent, You shared with me your impending parting too
But neither of you perhaps know that life does not prepare one for death
Nothing can prepare one for death except death itself!
The finality and acknowledgement of it
The acute numbness and longing it strikes you with
And as you and I came to see
The inordinate loneliness and a yawning void it creates
Nothing prepares you for death
From three to two and now to one...perhaps then to none
We are traversing from here to elsewhere
All too soon…
You will both find each other in that ethereal world perhaps now...
From here and now to nowhere and everywhere I shall seek you both here and hereafter
in pictures and in memories
Within me and outside of me…
Sometimes with tears and sometimes with smile for the rest of my remaining years...
- A G K
March, 2020
P.S. I do know that you will see this and this will reach you both somehow...
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